You’ve done the work. You’re confident, you’re a Challenge, you’re not needy. But you keep encountering women who seem to be playing a different, frustrating game. She’s testing your persistence, making you jump through hoops, and judging you by a secret rulebook. You’re not imagining it; you are experiencing the mind games girls play.
It happened to Cary Grant and it will happen to you, too.
This is not a sign that you are doing something wrong. It is a sign that you have encountered a “Rule-Following Woman” – a woman with medium Interest Level who is more committed to her defensive strategy than to authentic connection. This is a Frame Battle, and she is testing to see if your frame is stronger than her programming.

This article is your counter-move. It is The ‘Frame Maintenance’ Protocol, a system for identifying these games, refusing to play them, and discovering whether she has the flexibility to be a real partner or the rigidity of a failed strategist.
The Diagnosis: She’s Testing Your Frame Against Her Programming
A high-value woman tests for genuine strength. A “Programmed Player” tests for compliance with her arbitrary rules. Here’s how to spot the difference.
Some “Mind Games Girls Play” Examples (Low-Value Tests):
- The Hoop Jump: She refuses to give her number and insists you take her email or business card.
- ARDA Translation: This is a test of compliance. She wants to see if you will abandon your masculine frame (leading the interaction) and submit to hers (following her process).
- The Persistence Test: She is deliberately difficult to schedule a date with, to see “how much you really want it.”
- ARDA Translation: A woman with high Interest Level helps you. A woman playing games creates obstacles. She is confusing your tolerance for frustration with genuine interest.
Your High-Value Responses (The Correct Counter-Moves):
- You Refuse to Chase: You will not send multiple follow-ups or plead for a date.
- ARDA Translation: You are communicating that your time is valuable and you have other options. You are screening her for enthusiasm.
- You Maintain Your Standards: You will not switch to email or jump through her hoops.
- ARDA Translation: You are demonstrating an unwavering frame. Your process has been proven to work, and you will not deviate from it for a woman with medium interest.
Here’s what’s actually happening: You’ve encountered a woman who has medium Interest Level in you but is more committed to her dating rules than to exploring that attraction. She’s been programmed (by books, friends, past experiences) to believe that men must jump through specific hoops to “prove” themselves worthy. Yeah, this is what we’re up against, and these are the mind games girls play.
Time for a Mindset Reset
Stop thinking like this:
- “If I just prove myself according to her standards, she’ll come around”
- “Her rules show she’s high-value and worth the extra effort”
- “I need to demonstrate my persistence to pass her tests”
- “Maybe I should adjust my approach to fit her expectations”
Start being aware of the mind games girls play:
- “A woman who wants me doesn’t make me prove it through arbitrary hoops”
- “Inflexibility is a character flaw, not a virtue”
- “I’m interviewing her as much as she’s interviewing me”
- “My standards matter more than her rulebook”
The harsh reality: You’re getting caught up in trying to win someone who’s more committed to her system than to you. High-value men don’t negotiate with rule-followers – they find women who are flexible enough to appreciate authentic attraction.
Your Action Plan: The Frame Maintenance Protocol
You do not win a frame battle by arguing. You win by demonstrating that your frame is immovable.
Phase 1: The Non-Negotiable Stance (Hold the Line)
- Action: Continue to operate from the ARDA principles. Make one clear, direct offer (e.g., for her number, for a date). Do not justify it. Do not negotiate it.
- The Mindset: As General Stone would say, “Only you can give away your power.” Do not give it away by submitting to her process.
Phase 2: The Flexibility Test (Her Move)
- Action: After your clear offer is met with a “game” or a “rule,” you do nothing. You politely withdraw your attention.
- The Litmus Test: The entire dynamic now rests on her next move. Will she bend her “rule” to keep the interaction going? Or will she let a high-value man walk away to protect her flawed strategy? Her action is the only data that matters.
Phase 3: The Final Judgment (The Filter)
- If she bends her rule (e.g., texts you first, suggests a time): Green Flag. Her Interest Level was high enough to override her programming. You may proceed with caution.
- If she doubles down on her rule or disappears: Red Flag. She has failed the Flexibility test of the Attitude Matrix. The protocol has successfully filtered out an incompatible, rigid partner. You have won by not wasting any more of your time.
The Bottom Line on Mind Games Girls Play
A “mind game” is a test from a woman who is unsure. She is looking for a man with a frame stronger than her own doubts. When you refuse to play her game, you are not being difficult; you are giving her the one thing she is subconsciously looking for: a man with unwavering standards and a reality she can trust.
The woman worth your time will be intrigued by your refusal to jump through her hoops. She will recognize your strength and rise to meet it. The woman who is not will be filtered out by your frame. Either outcome is a victory.
Remember, guys: Don’t play her game. Make your frame the only game in town.
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